So many people view their younger years with a reverent nostalgia. When I hear about such people, my first thought is wondering what the hell they've confused their youth for.
I don't know about you guys, but my younger years were shit.
Not entirely, not all the time, but there was a lot of shit in there. Depression, suicidal ideation, self harm. I lost multiple relationships as a result of my tendency to, ironically, obsess over losing them. I routinely struggled to keep up with work at school and often broke down as a result, leaving school in the middle of the day and some days simply not showing up. I was not in a good place then.
Where am I now? Better. Not perfect, but I'm doing better, and that's all I can really ask for. I see a therapist, I take medication. Slowly I've begun taking more work on myself, and developing systems to keep track of things.
Yet many people view their young years as the apex of their lives. "Live fast, die young" seems to be a recurring motto: live your life while you still can, because it's all downhill from here.
I'm not going to say I don't have fear of growing old--I'm sure everyone does, in some degree, as there is a fear of most any uncertainty in our lives. There just doesn't seem to be much of an optimistic view of age in our society. As medical science improves, we're learning more about the plethora of illnesses and physical maladies that will occur in ever-greater amounts as we age, from weakening bones and muscles to more frightening neurocognitive degeneration leading to things such as strokes and Alzheimer's disease. The media takes those articles and sees fit to publish them every chance it gets, perhaps to satisfy our transgressive curiosity about our own mortality.
Add to that the fact that our media seems to avoid portraying the elderly in any form. The majority of commercials, films, and television shows rely on youthful models of an idealized society. Rarely if ever do you see 65+ people in staring roles. If you do, they normally have something to do with coming to terms with death and aging, such as in David Lynch's "The Straight Story" or Michael Haneke's "Amour". Age is often viewed as a negative, and if there are happy endings to be gotten out of it, they seem to occur despite age, and with that spectre always on the horizon.
Of course we don't want to get old when our society tells us how much it sucks.
But does it have to? Certainly our modern view of age is a far cry from more traditional views of the elderly. In olden times, elderly people were viewed as peoples experienced and hardened by the world, filled with advice to dispense to the younger peoples. They took an active, and in some cases central role in the community. Their aging was not hidden from the world, as is the case with many of our elderly shuffled off to nursing homes, but was exposed and, more importantly, embraced by the community.
Why can't we do the same thing now? Why can't we view age not as a gradual degeneration, but as an opportunity to garner ever more experiences and better ourselves? Why can't we view aging as an opportunity for us to do ever more things for the state of the world, and not simply to be a drain on worldwide resources?
As I've grown older, I've become better. I've become healthier. And I don't intend for that to stop anytime soon. My body may weaken, and so may my mind, but that doesn't mean I ever have to stop growing, stop getting better, stop being there for others and for myself.
Why can't age be a good thing?
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